"Clean Out Your Fridge Day" [drabble, Jack & Sam, K]

Title: Clean Out Your Fridge Day
Author: A. Karswyll
Fandom: Stargate: SG-1
Rated: K
Words: 1,178
Summary: Engaged in of one his least favourite holiday on November 15th, Jack had hoped to get it over and done with before Carter, Teal'c, and Jonas get to his house for team movie night.


Season 6
15 November 2002


Jack held his breath and peered into the bowels of the beast. Spying another transformed creature he gingerly reaching in and, holding it by the very tips of his fingers, drew it out. Holding the offensive thing at arm's length he deposited it directly into the garbage and not onto the counter cluttered with things already taken from the beast.

He reached into the beast again and—brrriiinnng—he jolted at the sound of his doorbell and knocked his head on the shelf and cursed at the flash of pain. Jack rubbed at his forehead as he pulled his head out of the refrigerator and bellowed in annoyance, "It's open! Come in!"

Sticking his head back into his fridge he could hear his front door open and close, and approaching footsteps, even though sound was muffled by the barrier of the open fridge door.

"Um..." his unexpected visitor trailed off, "um, Sir?"

Jack leaned back, to look around the open fridge door, with a Chinese takeout carton in his hand and looked up at Carter. She looked rather surprised and unsure as she stood in the entrance to his kitchen holding four boxes of pizza and two shopping bags hanging from her hands.

Surprised at seeing her himself, Jack twisted his wrist around to look at his watch. It was time for movie night already? Crap, it was. A touch sheepish he got up off the floor in front of his fridge. "Sorry, Carter, I thought I'd have this done before you guys got here."

Eyeing him, and the countertop cluttered with things from his fridge, Carter cautiously pushed things around to make room for the pizza boxes and drinks and snacks on the counter. "What are you doing?"

"Cleaning out my fridge of course." Jack checked the interior of the takeout carton, and finding it empty except for a few noodles clinging to the sides, tossed the carton.

"I can see that, but... why now?"

"'Cause it's the 15th."

"What does the 15th have to do with anything?"

"It's Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day," Jack pointed at his calendar pinned to his kitchen wall.

"Ah, one of your days is it Sir?" Carter said with a twinkle in her blue eyes.

"They aren't my days," Jack said indignant, "they're real holidays."

"Yes Sir," she agreed dutifully.

"Watch your tone Carter," he waggled a finger at her.

"Sir, yes Sir," Carter said in the perfect respectful subordinate voice of hers.

Jack rolled his eyes and didn't even know why he bothered. He'd yet to meet anyone who could beat Carter at playing the innocent-subordinate-who-was-really-mocking-you card. It was those blue eyes, and that smile, you could never believe she could be that devious.

She poked at some of the items on the counter. "So, any ideas why today is the day you clean out your fridge?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, why now, in November? Why not in the spring or something with spring cleaning?"

He shrugged and turned his attention back to his refrigerator. "No idea. I always thought it had to do with Thanksgiving, you know? Making room for all the leftovers you have afterwards."

Carter made a sound that could be agreement—or it was just a sound to say she was listening—as she shuffled the items on his countertop around with clinking noises. "Ugh, is this a piece of cake from your birthday last month?"

"What? No, of course not," he pulled his head out of the fridge again and glanced over his shoulder at her. "The cake didn't even make into the fridge."

"Ah, that sounds more likely," she agreed cheekily as more countertop items moved. "Don't know why I'd think cake would last that long around you."

Jack shook his head and turned back to his task. The tomatoes were still good but the lettuce had gone all limp and slimy so he tossed the package.

Ah, there's where it had gone, he thought with satisfaction as from behind the nearly empty pickle jar he pulled out the ceramic figurine, tucked against the back of the fridge. Juggling the tomatoes, figurine, and jar he moved to the counter and set them down with the other items that were to go back in the fridge.

Carter cocked her head at him and pointed to the ceramic figurine. "I've been meaning to ask. Why do you keep a ceramic frog in your fridge? We never know what to do with it when we've, ah, had to clean out your fridge for you."

"You mean you don't have one in your fridge?"

"A ceramic frog?" Carter gave him a strange look. "No Sir."

"I don't mean a frog, but something with baking soda in it?"

"Is that what that stuff is?" she asked as she poked at the white mass visible in the frog's wide open mouth.

"Yes, that 'stuff' is baking soda."

"Seems a rather, er... strange way to store baking soda. Doesn't it go bad exposed in the fridge like that?"

Jack shook his head. "It isn't for storage Carter. You mean your mom didn't keep baking soda in the fridge to help keep the fridge smelling clean?"

Carter looked a bit surprised, and after a moment, shook her head. "No."

"Ah well, mine did," Jack said with a shrug as tapped the ceramic head of the frog. "Lots of people just used the open boxes I think, but we always used stuff like this frog."

"Huh."

"Huh what?"

"Actually Sir, I never gave it much thought, but your fridge always did smell... better than one would expect considering what was spoiled when we had to clean it out."

Jack couldn't help but quirking a grin at her at that. He could well imagine what his leftovers, and just the regular food, had mutated into when stranded off-world, having a bit of experience in seeing what happened when the whole team got stranded off-world for a bit and no one was around to clean out their fridges.

Brrriiinnng!

Well, Jack thought as he looked around his still disorderly kitchen, sounded like the rest of the team was here. "Door's open! Come in!"

His front door opened and closed again and shortly two aliens were standing in the entrance to his kitchen. Both raised their eyebrows at the clutter though it was, typically, Jonas who openly looked surprised and not Teal'c.

"Hi guys, go ahead and put movies by the TV and then come help Carter with the pizza," he waved them towards the living room. As the wide-eyed Jones trailed after Teal'c, he was struck by an idea. Leaning towards Carter he said quietly, "Pst, Carter? When I was stuck with Maybourne a couple weeks back, who cleaned out my fridge?"

"Um," Carter flushed a bit, "I did."

"Jonas didn't help?"

"Ah, no Sir," she said warily. "It was just me."

"Excellent," Jack grinned deviously and rubbed his hands together. Raising his voice he called out, "Hey, Jonas! You want to partake in a traditional Earth activity?"

-FINISHED

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